Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Heaven and Hell

This little stinker gives me so much hell, that some days I wonder how long my patience can hold.  One minute, he is as sweet as candy, the next, as rotten as a bad banana.  It's a switch, so I guess I can call it a blessing that the rotteness is generally short lived.

The temper tantrums can be caused by anything, really.  Say no to letting him drink lemon juice or heavy whipping cream, fit.  See his brothers playing with HIS ball, fit.  Put in his beloved Little People DVD only to have Jackson change the channel to something else, fit.

The fits are generally short lived, so they are ignored, as the "expert" information we've read on temper tantrums tell us to do.  Take away all attention to him and his behavior.  His speech therapist gave some "must reads" on the issue (after a discussion we had) and I must admit, it was nice to reassure myself that ignoring his tantrums was the #1 best thing to do.

Occasionally, though, it escalates into a screaming tantrum that goes on and on and on.  When that happens, I simply put him in his room, tell him, "You may come down when you quit crying" and go on my way.
It's hard to be consistent.  Sometimes giving in, even if it is something he should not have/do/be in, would be SO much easier.  Of course, occasionally, I do give in (see post below about sour cream), but I try to stay consistent.  I've read that doing the same thing every time is key.

But, I don't want to raise children who believe they are entitled to receiving whatever they want, whenever they want it.  I don't want them to believe it is acceptable to throw a fit and receive a prize for their effort.  (Even if lemon juice would make an awful prize at the end).  I've seen first hand what giving in to your children does to your relationship with them and with their relationship with others....and folks, it Ain'T pretty!


So, I just make sure to celebrate the good, express how happy it makes me when Ethan does whatever is a positive at the time I think of it.

I just hope I am doing the right thing...that I will be able to raise him up to learn to control his temper (for now he is two and only small explanations are given) and conquer that devil within.  We all have one...you just aren't lucky enough to be two and able to let it rear its ugly head.  ;)


4 Words to brighten my day:

Jess said...

Hang in there!!!!

PapaJeff said...

Hang in there? Is that the best a graduate student with a Bachelor's degree in psychology can do? Hang in there? Of course, that would be my advice as well, so you may be onto something, Jess.:).

It's going to be weird to have Jessie and Jess in the family. Of course, weird sometimes identifies us in this family:).

Cathi said...

It is hard not to give in! I'm pretty good at it, but A and D will give L whatever he wants just to get him to be quiet - for me that's the hardest part, telling the older kids they can't be nice to their little brother!

bluecottonmemory said...

I just gave my 12 year old a lecture for pouting because he wanted to eat on the way to the soccer game and he could have eaten at home. You don't always get what you want - isn't that a song? LOL

Just don't blink! Don't back down! Stick to it! And, if worse comes to worse, make him lay down with you to take a nap! He'll wake up having forgotten the entire thing.

Parenting is a shepherding job where you have to always constantly keep them on the right path, repeating lessons as they move into new age brackets and reasoning capabilities! Just when one argument has won the battle, a new one begins in another area. Within every good mother is a collie instinct and the determination of a general! LOL